February 15, 2012 (Defeat)

I have never been so defeated and disappointed in my 15 year old life. In PE class, our team lost the final game. The sport was dodgeball, and if it was the same old me from 5th grade, everyone would laugh at the 180 change in me. I used to detest dodgeball. I hated it so much before. However, now, I am the team captain for this quarter. Can you believe it? Wow. Seriously. That big change in me. What happened to me? Well, this new me also does have a dark side. Anyhow, I really laugh at my change. However, there is no space for laughing today. We lost. I lost. I failed. I failed terribly as a team leader. I couldnt cheer my teammates on and encourage them, give them hope. I didnt do these. I've tried, but not hard enough, I guess. I am an inexperienced team leader. This is the first time I've been a team leader of a group. However, the experience issue is just an excuse. I was a bad leader. I better go "burn some brain cells" and think of how to become a better leader.